Oct 27, 2016

NoQS Agent Round: DON'T - YA Romantic Thriller

Name: Kyra Palmer

Twitter Handle: @kp_shadow1287
Title: DON’T
Genre: YA Romantic Thriller
Word Count: 73,000

My Main Character's Most Stressful Relationship is:

My MC's most stressful relationship is with her brother. They’re twins who don’t fit any of the conventional twin norms. Their opposite personalities cause friction between them and they are constantly trying to protect one another much to each other’s chagrin. He is dating one of her best friends, which is awkward for her. The brother also believes he is the arch nemesis of the antagonist/love interest which sinks his deception of his sister even further for the sake of defending her but the lies only backfire and pull his twin and the enemy closer together.


Last week, high school senior Charlotte “Char” Matthews ran in front of a semi to save a puppy. Then a choice at school backfires, and the same rash, stupid bravery ensnares her in a lab partnership with the boy who terrorized her childhood. Except now, Jasper Calvary is all grown up and armed with a rap sheet instead of super glue—proof this bad boy’s heart isn’t secretly golden. With their grades tied together, her GPA is in jeopardy, which makes it impossible for her to resist stooping to his level.

Char’s patience evaporates the first day and she embarrasses Jasper in public, triggering an unspoken challenge. Soon their tension-rigged classroom banter escalates into psychological warfare: dares, trespassing, and high speeds stunts. The harder Char and Jasper push against each other, the more they’re drawn together. As their game ricochets out of control, all the rules are broken, rubber burns, and sparks ignite. The line between predator and prey fades, and with their hearts vulnerable, both let go of all caution, fanning their attraction into a blaze.

The fragile flame between them is smothered though, when their playing results in Jasper’s arrest and he blames Char. Burned by betrayal, Jasper lures Char into a trap for revenge, however, it’s more dangerous than he ever intended. Stranded in the middle of nowhere and locked in a fight for their lives, suddenly love and grades aren’t the only things at risk. No help is coming—no friends, no teachers, no witnesses. Survival means spilling blood, but losing means being the one who goes home in a body bag.

First 250:

I wish people came with a warning label—be polite and give others a chance to avoid possible negative side effects of association like bad grades, missed curfews, or lying to parental units. Or perhaps more helpful would be hazard signs to warn of personality defects. My best friend’s would read: Personal Bubble Infiltrator. My brother’s would be: Borderline Narcissistic Major, Minoring in Manipulation. His girlfriend: Heart-breaker for Sport. Except such a courtesy would be asinine and ruin a desirable first impression, wrecking friendships before they began. Honesty is an absurd policy; I’d rather befriend the lie.

Guilty of procrastination, I’ve been sentenced to the high school equivalent of a CIA black site with busywork, also known as freshman science. An electric chair would be cozier than these unforgivable metal chairs with uneven legs. Test-out options nonexistent, and with graduation on the line, I had no choice but to suffer through this class.

The room stunk of formaldehyde and juveniles. No amount of slumping in my chair spared me the humiliation. And it wasn’t the anonymous, solitary variety either.

Nope, the torture included one hundred deplorable percent of him.

Jasper Calvary. His warning label: Don’t.

A strong, angular jaw and well-defined cheekbones replaced the boyish face that haunted my childhood. The brown hair, almost dark enough to be black, and striking blue eyes were as I remembered. A shot of concentrated Caribbean I wished I could bottle and keep with me. In a non-creepy way, like on a key chain or a necklace.


  1. *Scream* I would love to have a look at your ms! Please send the full as a word.docx attachment to stacey@donaghyliterary.com be sure to copy the query and synopsis into the body of the email. Use email subject REQUESTED #NoQs YA thriller

  2. Shiver. Please send your query, synopsis, and first 10 pages (all pasted in the email body) to whitley@inklingsliterary.com. Thanks!

  3. Shriek! Please send the first 50 ages as an attachment to soloway@andreabrownlit.com. Please use REQUESTED: Nightmare on Query Street: DON'T in the subject line. Looking forward to reading more! Jennifer